Tuesday, January 31, 2006

An Idiots guide to, well, being an idiot



Isn't the above picture ironic?

Well anyways, I know what you people are saying, "Two posts in one day! How can we be this lucky?" I have the answer for you though my followers. The answer is impromptu naps at 8:30 that prevent me from falling asleep at a somewhat reasonable (on a sober night) hour. Well, in lieu of boring you with more explanatory talk, I'll get right to it.

I have a list of pet peeves. I'm sure you've read it. If not, you probably should. Anyhow, these are some more recent things that have come to my attention that really "grind my gears" if you will. Full posts on them may happen. So here it is.....

Will's "Idiots guide to being an Idiot"

-Chuck Norris Jokes-I'll admit that they were funny when they first started but seriously, what is everyones obbsession with this guy? He's not that cool and jokes about him, however original you think they may be are, for the most part, just plain stupid. If I hear another joke about his roundhouse kick or his fucking mustache I'm going to have to roundhouse whoever says it to me. If you're still spitting out or relaying these stupid attempts at humor you should probably just join the cast of best week ever. They'd believe that your comments are "witty, satirical and comedic genius". I mean, if that fat dude with huge gap in his teeth can have his own show so can you. Aim high idiots of America. The entertainment industry is yours for the taking right now.

-Top 100 countdowns-Strapped for Televsions show ideas is a mild way to describe the reason for these abominations. Once again, when they first came out I thought some were cool. For instance, "100 Most Metal Moments", "100 Hottest Hotties"(Good eye candy!), and "100 Craziest Police Chases" for example. Now it's absolutely ridiculous. VH1 should just be called "The top 100 channel". E! enterntainment pretty much just rides VH1's jock with almost identical programming. What's next, Top 100 craziest shit to ever come out of Tom Cruise's ass". Please spare me these lists, idiots.

-Dance Music-Music in the same vain as "Nelly" and other similar crap. Not much to rant about here, if you listen to this type of music then you're an idiot.

-B.O.-Let's get this straight people. Smelling like a big bag of garbage is not appealing. If you smell, that's bad enough but some people (cough, the new foriegn kids down the hall, cough) have a smell emminating from their room like their incubating their workout clothes. Buy some axe, take a shower and use some deodorant. We all have to live in this world and noone wants to smell your stinky ass arm pits.

Well, I had more but that's all I can think of for now. So, yeah. The end...or is it?