That's right people. You're reading the writings of a college graduate. Well, not technically yet but my classes and finals are over and done with. With that in mind I'm going to talk a little bit about my experience here at SUNY Oneonta. If you're reading this looking forward to the non-stop laughs that my blogs usually ellicit than you might want to stop reading here. And pick up after the next paragraph.
Okay, weeded those people out. For starters I'd just like to say that my two years spent here at Oneonta were 2 of the greatest of my life. I've made so many new and awesome friends and I've opened my eyes to so much more that life has to offer. Stuff that can't be found just sitting around Orange County and drinking. My time spent here and the friends I've made will live on in my heart and mind forever.Good luck to all of you, graduating or not, and I hope that we all stay in touch for the rest of our lives. Don't worry, I'll be up to visit and that's when the proverbial shit will hit the fan. Until then, stay klassy and krazy. But not too krazy without me.
Welcome back those of you who don't have a sappy side.
Now, don't get me wrong, my experience at Oneonta was predominantly good but, for the sake of entertainment (gasp, I forgot what that was. I haven't read anything entertaining in this blog in months), I'm going to tell a little tale about my experiences here. Things to note if you decide to pursue undergraduate studies here. So here it is, my list of grievances with SUNY Oneonta.
1. Frat guys-It's true that in other college towns frats are the thing to do so this probably only applies to Oneonta. 90% of the frat guys here are complete and utter douchebags. There's no avoiding their douchebaggery. Their popped collars can be seen all over campus and when you're downtown after a night of drinking, 9 times out of 10, they're the people who are brawling outside of Joey's or the Oak. Don't try to reason with them. Just grunt and get out of their way. You don't want any of their primordial ooze dripping onto your ever so sexy and drunk body. Woops, that last sentence refers mostly to me. Plus they're all a bunch of meat head, drug dealing coke heads.
2. Housing-This is specifically on-campus housing. Although I had a blast in my dorm rooms I have quite a lot of beef with these dormitories. First of all, if you are a new transfer, it is imperative that you get your down payment into the school not only on time, but I'd advise to get it in rather early. I, with my little sophmore college mind, was silly enough to think about attending other schools before making my final decision. Once I decided to come to Oneonta it was just before the deadline and I sent in my deposit. I got TRIPLED in a double. For those of you who aren't good with simple college dormitory terminology that means that there were three people living in a room designed to house comfortably(although this part is debatable)two almost fully grown males. It was absolutely atrocious and I wouldn't wish that fate on anyone. Furthermore, when trying to get "de-tripled" the people at the housing office were of little to no help and basically fought me the whole way.(Actually it's not "basically" I did actually get into several verbal fights with these morons. I like to say I won but, their bitchiness was something I couldn't compete with).
3. Bathrooms-This also refers to campus housing. WHAT THE FUCK! I have to admit, I used to be the guy at home that would pee on the seat or toss TP on the ground in a public restroom but, rest assured all of you who think that my actions were very non-conformist and rebellious, this behavior is just unsanitary and gross. There's pee on the ground and seat almost everyday. The shower curtains are never pulled within the bathtub walls which leads to uneccassary flooding and, on top of that, the custodial staff doesn't supply an adequate amount of toilet paper. Whew, that was a lot of shit. But seriously people, it's a human right (or it damn well should be) to be able to relieve yourself in some sort of sanitary conditions. So, keep the bathrooms clean please.
4. Last call-I'm from Orange County and the last call at bars there is 4a.m. In Oneonta, the last call is 1 O'clock on weekdays and 2 O'clock on Weekends. This is just blasphemy. You can't drink in the dorms so, unless you start your night out at 6 or 7 O'clock(I'm doing that right now actually, it's awesome), it's hard to get to your desired drunk. And staying up all night is out of the question unless you know people who live off campus...or do a lot of coke which seems to be prevalent here but fuck that bullshit drug.
And, to be honest, that's really all I can muster up. Campus food sucks but it's almost a guarantee (read: I'm guessing) that it does on every other college campus.
So there you have it. If you plan on attending this school you should take strong notice of my advice. If you already go here you know exactly what I'm talking about and if you're living on campus, you can help remedy the bathroom problem by PICKING UP AFTER YOUR DAMN SELF!
Other than that Oneonta has many, many pro's. Cold cheese pizza, a plethora of babes, a plethora of bars (namely The Silver Bullet with it's 5 dollar entry fee and 25 cent drinks), and, for the most part, the people up here rock.
It's about to get sappy again.
Once again good luck to all of the friends I've made and to all the people I've met. I hope your life is one filled with peace, love and creativity. Keep me posted on what you're up to if we're not close. We'll get close....no not like that you fuckers with your sick minds. Crazy Oneontans!
To all of my close friends, ROCK THE FUCK ON! Keep it krazy and good luck once again in all that life tosses your way guys: Bryan, Ryan, Boot, Justin, Billy, Be the E, Matt, Michelle, Frank with a gambling problem, The Forman
gang, Kyle, Jake, Shaun, Tim,Knap, Briscoe, The gang at 59 East Street, Mary, Connolly, and many more who I'm sure I've missed. Don't be sad, just drop me a line, I'll add you to the list. Much Love and good luck to all ya'llz. I'll be back to visit, you can bet your momma's panties...and that's the troof!
So that's it Oneonta, Peace!
And someone find me a job!
P.S. If you actually read this blog I think it would be funny if you wrote a memory or something that you and I have shared in Oneonta in comment form. Do it!